


Hordak

by Korvesta_Kaakkoon



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Character Study, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-06
Updated: 2020-06-06
Packaged: 2021-03-03 18:41:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24570244
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Korvesta_Kaakkoon/pseuds/Korvesta_Kaakkoon
Summary: A clone remembers.
Relationships: Entrapta/Hordak (She-Ra)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 139





	Hordak

**Author's Note:**

> Just when I thought I’d gotten out of this fandom, I get dragged back in, kicking and screaming. Here. Have this.

There was something wrong with him. 

He could tell his brothers had noticed. Troubling… _emotions_ were plaguing him. Uncertainty. _Anxiety._

His brothers’ judgement rested heavy on his shoulders. They said nothing. They would say nothing as long as Prime said nothing and Prime had not yet acknowledged it. He was too busy dealing with the visitors from the underdeveloped planet. 

_Etheria._

He gritted his teeth together. 

Next to him, his brother spared him a glance. He could feel it too, through the hive mind. And he did not appreciate it. 

It’d been happening ever since he was cleansed. Ever since he’d awakened and been told that he’d been corrupted. It didn’t sound right, he didn’t think someone like him could be corrupted. It just… it didn’t _feel_ right. But it must’ve been true, because Prime had said it. 

And if it were true, that meant that these… residual emotions were also part of that corruption. 

Emotions weren’t something to be trusted. 

And that brought with it another emotion. 

_Fear._

If Prime realized he was still impure, he would surely just dispose of him. 

Which, naturally, he would submit to. He was only a cog in the great machine of peace Prime had built. 

But. 

There it was again. A gripping feeling in his chest that made it difficult to breathe. 

His brother next to him clicked his tongue.

*

He… remembered the guest.

The one dressed in red and with the habit of going to places she didn’t belong. He _remembered_ her. 

Not all of it. Just. Pieces. 

It didn’t feel the same as remembering with the hive mind. It came with feelings he didn’t understand. 

Indifference. Trust. Pride. 

Betrayal. 

And then…

Grief. 

Catra. That was what her name was. 

_Little sister_ , was what he was supposed to call her. 

She gave him a name and he…

It felt _right._

_Hordak._

He didn’t understand the anger he felt towards her. The feeling of boiling resentment that he felt just seeing her. 

He didn’t _know_ her. 

But he felt like he _should’ve._

The resulting outburst of emotions was strong enough to draw Prime’s attention. 

Or maybe it was just his attention on Catra… on _little sister_ , that made him notice. 

_Cast out the shadows._

_All beings must suffer to become pure._

*

There was something wrong with him.

He could tell his brothers hadn’t noticed. Prime’s ship was in terrible disrepair after the attack of She-Ra. She had barged in to kidnap little sister from their flock, condemning her to eternal darkness among her whole planet. 

He’d been there to witness her transformation into the being of magic and stealing away little sister and he agreed with his brothers. 

Truly, she was cruel and idiotic for denying her people the light of Horde Prime. 

And to sully his ship this way. 

His brothers and he helped clean the mess they’d left behind. To see the pristine halls of Prime’s ship destroyed like this only served to frustrate him more. 

Why did the Ehterians not understand the beauty of Prime’s peace?

What made them so… _emotional?_ It seemed like a hindrance. A _nuisance._

Something strange caught his attention. A light was reflecting from something shiny on the floor. He knelt down to pick it up. 

It was a purple crystal of some sort. Ancient and rudimentary in its design. A style like that hadn’t been used on Prime’s ship for generations. 

Something was etched onto it. He studied it closer. Was it one of Prime’s treasures from planets liberated?

_LUVD_

His breath caught in his throat. 

”…Entrapta?” he said.

*

The memories were haunting him.

They weren’t hive memories. They weren’t something one of his brothers had shared. It was far too strong, the emotions far too volatile. 

But… they weren’t his either. 

They _couldn’t_ be. 

He tried to hide them away. Bury them _deep_. If Prime found out –

No. What he needed to worry about was the possibility of his own corruption. If… if he was a proper brother, he would go to Prime, kneel before him and beg him to rid him of these fractured memories. 

He could remember… a dilapidated room. With tanks of liquid on the walls. Low lighting. Someone skittering behind him, purple strands of hair reaching past him to grab something from the table. 

He could remember _warmth_. Contentment. 

_Love._

He must’ve been broken. A failure. A… a defect. He should’ve… A proper clone would’ve reported to Prime. 

But…

But he would…

Prime would take the memories away. 

The _comfort._

He tried to push the thoughts down. He wasn’t a _failure_. He was a proud soldier in Prime’s service. He was kept on Prime’s ship, because he was a treasured cog in the machine. 

He didn’t _need_ these memories. Whatever they were, he didn’t want them. 

They weren’t all good either. 

He could remember _pain_. Gnawing, bone deep ache caused by a failing body.

He could remember _frustration_. His time had been running out, his body withering away and his brothers and the comfort of the hive out of his reach. 

Everything was clear, when he was in the hive. No one could lie, nothing could be hidden. 

It had been different then. He’d been all alone, in a world, where its inhabitants lied and cheated and left you to die. 

_Nothing_ could stay a secret in Prime’s light. 

Except… that wasn’t really true, was it?

With Prime busy trying to fight his ancient enemy, the thoughts and memories grew sharper. He could almost… _almost_ see the person, holding the crystal in front of him, slotting it into the suit. He could almost _hear_ them talking, feel it calm his nerves. 

Prime couldn’t see it. He would take it away. 

But in the dead of night, resting in a pod with his brothers, the thoughts were nearly inescapable. 

She-Ra had somehow managed to evade Prime’s grasp. She and her… her friends… were fighting back and even though it was a losing battle, others were joining in, shirking away from the light. 

They were talking of… a rebellion. 

It… He could almost…

He watched them and watched how it enraged Prime. 

He didn’t understand. 

But at least it meant, that his imperfections and failures hadn’t been seen yet. 

He would live a moment longer. 

He should’ve thrown out the crystal. That would’ve surely taken away the pain. 

But…

He found himself returning to the place, where he’d found the crystal, over and over again. He wasn’t sure what he expected to find. There was nothing but rubble there, but all the same, he traced his steps there, looking around for any additional clues. 

He was sure that if he could just… find out more, if he could _figure out_ why the crystal was so important and why he could almost feel the presence of another person by his side, he could stop _feeling_ this much. 

Instead, Prime found him and invited him to help reconnect with his former self to access its memories. 

It had unfortunate side symptoms, though. As Prime accessed his old memories, he too, felt his mind delving deeper. 

He could remember places. _Fright Zone_. People. _An Empire he’d built in the name of Prime._

And… _her._

_Entrapta._

And… Hordak. 

The fear gripped his chest and he turned to look at Prime, dreading the reaction he’d see. But Prime was far too preoccupied with the memories of his older self. 

He could remember… thoughts of fear. Of never reaching Prime’s light. Of pain and sorrow, of acceptance and… and love. 

And then. Betrayal. 

First… _her_. Then… then little sister. 

He’d trusted little sister’s… _Catra’s_ word over _hers._

And she’d been sent to die on Beast Island. 

His arms dropped to his sides. 

Then, that meant… that she was…

But the crystal. 

He reached to his pocket, holding the crystal tight. 

It’d been a gift from _her_. And it’d been _here._

Did that mean that she too, had…?

Could it?

Prime must’ve noticed something. He asked if there was something wrong. 

The lie came easy. 

He… hadn’t thought himself someone capable of lying to Prime himself.

*

The memories were fragmented. Out of order. He could remember places, faces, _plans._

And, most importantly, _her._

She was _everywhere_. He would look at the machinery of Prime’s ship and think of her. He would watch the battle bots approach the enemy and she would come to mind. 

He still didn’t know _who she was_. But… he could _feel_ it in his chest, that she was important. That he had… he had held her in high regard. 

It just couldn’t be. She was of a lesser species. _No_ other creatures could compare to Prime’s might and superior genetic makeup. And she was one of the _Etherians_. A rebel and a dangerous one at that, one of the rare ones, who seemed to be capable of understanding the mechanics of Prime’s technology. 

Rarely did Prime survey footage of her, but whenever he did, he could feel the emotions stirring in him again. 

She was someone _important_. Someone important to _him_ , but not the others. 

He didn’t _understand._

And if he didn’t get rid of these emotions soon, he was going to be terminated for them. 

Prime was getting emotional. His rage burned bright and it made him act out. It wasn’t… right. It wasn’t something he was supposed to do. 

It fed the doubts in his heart. 

And he could tell, he wasn’t the only one. 

Unrest moved around the hive mind. It waved off of them, its source uncertain, but its force amplified by the many minds sharing the feeling. In the unrest, his own thoughts got lost in the noise. His brothers hadn’t noticed. 

They were going to leave for Etheria. 

He didn’t know how to feel about it. 

He wasn’t supposed to be feeling anything at all. 

He was going to resolve these feelings. One way or another.

*

Etheria was about what he’d expected. Underdeveloped. Wild. Teeming with both magic and ancient technology.

It should’ve been pathetic. 

And yet…

It was familiar. It was… _comforting._

When the sun was shining, it was bright and warm. When the nights rolled around, it was quiet and cool and the sky was dotted with millions of stars that somehow looked very different from the planet’s surface than from up in the ship. 

He was ordered to help building the machine meant to overtake the First Ones’ magic binding machinery and release the Heart of Etheria from the rebels’ hands. Restlessness was keeping him from fully embracing his duties. He wasn’t the only one either. He caught a few of his brothers standing still and staring at their hands, at the lush forests and at the machinery they were building, the feeling of unrest growing stronger in waves in their mind. 

It didn’t matter. It _wouldn’t_ matter. Whether Prime was showing strong, emotional outbreaks or not, it wouldn’t really change anything. He was still the ultimate being of life in the Universe, Emperor of the Galactic Horde, ruler of the known universe, regent of the Seven Skies, he who brings the day and the night, Revered One of the Shining Galaxies, promised one of a thousand suns. There was nothing anyone could do to take him down. He was _unstoppable, unkillable._

He was _eternal._

Their unrest would only end in their death. 

Night had fallen some hours ago, but he and his brothers worked without rest to bring into fruition Prime’s wish. Some brothers worked on the machinery, others guarded the premises. He himself slipped away from the group to walk in the shade of the trees. 

There hadn’t been stars here when he’d last seen the sky. 

He could remember that. He could remember looking at the empty night sky and despairing at the vast void of nothing between him and the hive. 

Now he found himself wondering what…

What it would be like, to…

If maybe he’d think differently this time, if…

Something darted through the trees. 

He could hear them talking. Not his brothers, somebody else. 

”This isn’t about tech. It’s about our chipped friends.”

He stopped, his heart freezing in his chest. 

That voice…

That was…

It was _her._

He needed to warn his brothers. Summon them here. There was an infiltrator, a _rebel_ in their midst. 

He… 

He was going the wrong direction. 

He reached her just as she said: ”Yes! I’ve got it!”

When she looked up at him, all he could see was worry. There was something so _familiar_ seeing here where she shouldn’t be, doing something she wasn’t supposed to be doing. 

And he was having a hard time understanding how something so simple could make him feel _so much_. He was speechless before her. After having nothing but faltering memories of a person he wasn’t supposed to know, seeing her there, in front of him, was almost overwhelming. 

So, instead of thinking why, he demanded answers. Who was she, what was she doing in here? _What was she doing in his memories?_

And she called him by a name. 

A name that wasn’t supposed to be his. A name that only brought _pain_ under the watchful eyes of Prime. 

And yet, when she looked up at him with those eyes, he…

He thought he might…  
The winged beast interrupted them before he could think it through. It dragged her off into the forest and he realized what a mistake this had been. These feelings, they were temporary. They were a sign of _weakness_. Of _imperfection_. Inexcusable for someone cloned from the genetic material of Prime himself. 

”Your imperfections are beautiful!”

He shouldn’t have, but he found himself making rounds in the forest days after that, just in the hopes that she might show again. 

She never did. 

And then he was summoned to stand at Prime’s side, while he took over the Heart.

*

There was something wrong with him.

He could tell Prime had noticed. 

_She_ had been summoned to his ship. She had been brought here and now Prime had ordered him to dispose of her. 

He was a cog in the machine. A loyal brother and a clone of the Emperor of Galactic Horde. He was… he was…

He was taking too long. Her eyes were on him and he was sure she could recognize him. Even amidst all the clones, she still looked at him like she recognized him and like she accepted her fate. 

”Did you not hear me, little brother?” Prime demanded. ”Do it now.”

He…

*

His name was _Hordak_. It was not a name given to him, but it was a name he’d chosen himself. He had built himself a life in the image of Prime.

But now he was free.


End file.
